You Must Be Present To Win

The following is an excerpt from my forthcoming book: Cultivating presence is cultivating personal power and vice-versa. You must be present to win. Honesty with self is power. Your body and the moment is where truth lives. Find your body and you find the moment. Find the moment and you win. The present moment is … Continue reading You Must Be Present To Win

The Art of Aural, Giving Good Phone

Good aural sex is both an art and a discipline. Voice tone has a direct effect on the frequency and passion in an intimate relationship. Even when not anticipating formal intimacy, you’re building or diminishing a love connection with each interaction by how you speak. Remember that foreplay is a constant, rather than an event. … Continue reading The Art of Aural, Giving Good Phone

Responding to Relationship Stress with an F word

The following is an excerpt from my soon-to-be released book: I’ve compiled a list of several ‘F’ words relevant to intimate relationship. They are: Fight, Flight/Fantasy, Faint/Fold, Freak/Flail, Freeze, Fix, Fun, Feel, Flow and F**k. Our teachers in school told us that humans essentially only have two main responses to stress (that being fight or … Continue reading Responding to Relationship Stress with an F word

Killing a Deer, Honoring a Woman

As a young man, I killed a deer. It was one of the most profound moments in my life. I did not take this act lightly in any way. My purpose was food for the upcoming winter. Whether directly or indirectly, we all ‘take’ life in order to live. A life of some kind was … Continue reading Killing a Deer, Honoring a Woman

close up of an iris flower

Safety in Intimacy

In my experience, the things that most allow a woman to trust and open to an intimate partner are love and safety. With these two elements in place, a woman may more fully open her heart, whether it be a one-time, long-term, committed belovedship or a marriage. With a trustable and loving partner she can … Continue reading Safety in Intimacy

The Peace of the Mountains

Long vistas of ridges beyond ridges and deep, steep roadless canyons. A hot, sunny, still and cloudless day under a seemingly endless blue sky. I was traveling along a dry, rocky and rough dirt track through the mountains. Somewhere past halfway to the destination I came across a spring-fed pool. Water sheeted down a short … Continue reading The Peace of the Mountains

Thomas Jefferson Indian Peace Medal

Declaration of Interdependence now on sale

29 years after I wrote this Declaration of Interdependence it is FINALLY posted for sale ($1.99) at this website. (Click the SHOP button at the top of every page.) A percentage of every sale is automatically donated to carbon capture projects. The original Declaration of Independence draft was penned by Thomas Jefferson in 1776. This … Continue reading Declaration of Interdependence now on sale

man meditating on seaside

Meeting Your Beloved: A Pre-flight Checklist

Before coming together with your beloved intimate partner, consider taking an extra moment to feel into your depths and get more centered. Feel your role in the relationship. This is a way to consciously connect with yourself in preparation for loving another. I created a ‘Pre-flight Checklist’ for my personal use that you might find value … Continue reading Meeting Your Beloved: A Pre-flight Checklist

unrecognizable couple holding hands at sunset

He Loves Me (or not)

How can you tell if your man loves you? A coaching client recently asked me this question. Here's my expanded answer: The average woman is more sensitive to energy than the average man. A woman who’s connected to her core wisdom and is not afraid of her feelings will be even more tuned to energy and … Continue reading He Loves Me (or not)

happy couple hugging

Love Your Woman

How do you express love to a woman once she decides to share her time with you? Would you say that you set a low or a high bar for yourself in intimate relationship? How deeply intimate are you? Are you allowing your heart to expand as it holds ever more love? A common statement … Continue reading Love Your Woman

a couple kissing

Become An Expert In Loving Your Woman

Do you want to be deeply happy with each other? Do you want your life to be guided and moved by love? A good way to increase loving contentment is to become an expert in loving your woman. The goal is not to be an expert on any woman or all women, but this very … Continue reading Become An Expert In Loving Your Woman

close up photo of two person s holding hands

Guiding Principles for Partnership

It is said that true honesty is not about telling someone else what you think of them, but being honest about your own motivations. Every once in a while I come across a statement that describes how I want my intimate relationship to look and feel. Here are some of the best: Partnership Guiding Principles … Continue reading Guiding Principles for Partnership

Turn a Hug into a Magic Embrace

Who doesn’t love sharing a hug with an intimate partner? A loving hug can bring you both more in tune simply by placing your bodies together. Ideally, all your hugs feel energetically-clean with no sense of obligation to do more. You may just allow the loving touch to be a renewing contact and, of course, … Continue reading Turn a Hug into a Magic Embrace

man in black long sleeved shirt and woman in black dress

How Archery Skills Transfer To Relationship

Don’t rush and don’t over-clench, slightly change position to find “home.” Be intentional and pure of purpose. Stay aware of your breath and feel how all comes from your center. When you let go, do so cleanly and without regret. Are these the words of a tantra instructor or yoga teacher? They could be, but … Continue reading How Archery Skills Transfer To Relationship

man and woman kissing

Can You Revel In A Kiss?

We’re all familiar with alternate giving when it involves foot rubs, massage or more intimate touch. But, where is the rule that we always have to kiss simultaneously? As a love coach, I often encourage people to incorporate alternate kissing into their sex play. Imagine your lover gently, slowly, sweetly kissing your heart, neck, face … Continue reading Can You Revel In A Kiss?

crop faceless people clapping hands in room

How Deep Can You Glow?

Our energy doesn't end at our skin. Most people are familiar with hands-on energetic touch as a healing modality and we expect to feel energy in our bodies during a massage session. If we accept that energy is transmitted from our fingertips then it should be easy to realize that energy is transmitted by touch … Continue reading How Deep Can You Glow?

young woman stroking horse in sunlight

Horses, Tango, Intimacy

Horse. I felt elevated and moved as if by grace as the large horse pivoted and turned under my saddle. Her body and mind were in tune with my intention as we negotiated a hillside. The narrow and rough trail we had been following snaked down a forested canyon slope. My hands held the soft … Continue reading Horses, Tango, Intimacy

close up shot of a woman wearing a turtleneck sweater

Beauty of an Awakened Woman

Smiles come easily and her eyes shine with light. She speaks her feelings directly and with astuteness. Her posture transmits confidence and dignity. Her beauty and her personal power are integrated. People comment that there’s a radiance or “glow” about her. Perhaps it is a result deepening into self-acceptance and choosing to live as love. … Continue reading Beauty of an Awakened Woman

man and woman staring at each other

Be With Her

How to be with your chosen woman when you’re attention has been drawn to another? Simply give her your presence. Just be with your woman when you’re with her. Really be with her. Show up for yourself and her when you’re together. She is ever-changing and a source of wonder if you choose the intimacy … Continue reading Be With Her

grayscale photo of naked woman

When Is Sex Tantric?

There are innumerable definitions of tantra and tantric sex. Some people say that “neo-tantra” is neither new or tantra. Methinks they are both right and wrong. I present my definition to you here. I consider that sex is not tantric of itself. For me, tantra is an attitude and awareness of being fully present to … Continue reading When Is Sex Tantric?

Tantric Sex ~ the easy way

There is a lot to know with tantric sex, but this article is enough for you to begin transforming your lovemaking into a tantric journey. For instruction in specific methods such as ‘the pull / press / PC squeeze’, etc. I recommend finding a tantra class or private instruction with a tantric practitioner (daka or … Continue reading Tantric Sex ~ the easy way

Today Is The Best Day Of My Life

Other days have held more pleasure or excitement or closeness or more joy or accomplishment. There have been days in my life that were filled with wonder and adventure or more ease and connectedness than today. This day stands as the best simply because I am living it now. All previous days whether amazing or … Continue reading Today Is The Best Day Of My Life

When I Notice Another Woman

After my article “When a Woman Turns a Man’s Head” the question was raised:  How do you be with your chosen woman’s feelings when you obviously notice another woman? My advice is to be really with your woman when you’re with her. Give her your 100% when you're together. Let her know how important she … Continue reading When I Notice Another Woman

He Loves Me (or not)

How To Tell if Your Man Loves You? Recently, I was asked this question and I quickly thought of a couple examples. Here's a longer answer after giving the question more thought. The average woman is much more sensitive to energy than the average man and she can depend on her intuition to guide her first. … Continue reading He Loves Me (or not)

Conscious Relationship Ending

This is simply one way to navigate a "breakup". I do not mean to imply this is the best method for everyone. My intimate partner and I recently shifted into being non-sexual friends and allies. I honor truth and depth and openness and, knowing this, my woman came to me with her difficult truth. She … Continue reading Conscious Relationship Ending